So Mr. L is a bitch. Like what the hell man aren't things hard enough for me here?
What happened was I approached two guys sitting at a table and was invited to sit with them. I got up to get myself a drink and Mr. L, one of the waiters, said rudely that I can't just sit down at a table. What?? So this entire time I've heard the same thing over and over again; you have to hustle, anyone is fair game if they're sitting alone, go be friendly. I had no idea what he was talking about! Had I been doing something horribly wrong this whole time with no idea? Maybe it's the foreign language and culture, but I always feel like there are plenty of things I'm not getting, but I've been feeling pretty comfortable lately, so this really messed with me.
Drinks-wise, I got 2 from one guy and 4 from another. Not a bad night, and I can pay rent now! Early, I might add. That's always a great feeling.
I really liked the second two guys, they were businessmen. Very decent and interesting.
After all the customers left for the night I approached S at the bar so she could tell me what the heck Mr. L was talking about. She talks with an American accent and grew up in California so I felt a little more comfortable with her. That maybe was a mistake. Maybe she'd been drinking (probably, like everyone else in the bar staff included), but she asked very loudly who I was talking about then pointed at Mr. Lee and said "MR. LEE?" who of course promptly came over to us. He had definitely been drinking and was pretty belligerent. This is no fun to write about. They were both trying to explain things to me and S was trying to be the reasonable one and hold off Mr. Lee by talking sternly to (and sometimes shouting at) him in Korean when he went to far. He said customers felt like they couldn't turn me down when I asked to sit with them (my journal would say otherwise) and they complained to him. I kind of feel like that stupid and racist because my friend K, who's Taiwanese, said he told her the same thing but didn't tell that to any of the Korean girls. Mr. L is Korean. Most of the Korean girls are being paid by the bar to be there, I'm not, so he's more likely to help them for that reason too. Also they are more experienced so they are more likely to get him a drink from the customer. S tried to translate by saying that it's best to just go up to the table and say hello but not ask to sit down and to not ask for drinks.
Mr. L walked away and I asked her why he was being so rude but he heard and came back to yell at me some more. I'd had enough so I grabbed my bag and left. Mr. K, the other waiter, touched me on the shoulder like he normally does when I've had a bad night. Then he called my name and told me not to worry about it. He's so nice! But all I could do was nod and turn away quickly as I started crying.
Sunday, September 27, 2015
Thursday, September 24, 2015
9/17/15
It's 11:10, nothing yet. Most customers are either here just for the bar or to see a specific girl.
1. Korean guy, think he wanted a Korean girl.
2. Said no thank you
3. Acted uninterested, let me talk to him though.
Oh look there's Lilli with her puppy. I don't think I've ever seen her drink with anyone else. On nights when he isn't here I've seen her sit moodily by herself. There was a Lilli at my first bar too. They are aggressive, don't give a crap about their guys, and flirt shamelessly. Then when the night is over they take a cab home without looking back. I wish I could be more like them. You should see the way she hangs around his neck and whispers sweet nothings into his ear and laughs into his eyes. He's clearly smitten.
There's 5 other girls sitting down with me.
I want an anklet, they're so sexy. I talked to the lady wearing it. She's probably in her early 40's, very attractive. She was telling me how she has a couple part time jobs too too selling jewelry and real estate. She was divorced a while back and I told her how much I admired her for working so hard and being independent. She said very seriously that she didn't like being independent, that she'd rather be married. Honestly, I can't blame her. Sometimes being a housewife looks pretty damn awesome. If there were no kids involved let me add.
4. 3 local guys, only wanted S.
There's one girl here who's super popular, I hardly ever see her sitting down. She looks like a sexy sulky teenager. Probably why the guys love her. She doesn't walk very gracefully, and she's very petite.
There's another girl here, I'm pretty sure she's Korean. She has this perfectly lush figure and owns this dress that shows it off perfectly. It goes down to about her knees or a little lower, is clingy with a soft and stretchy material, and plunges at the neck. Her body looks soft and youthful, and she normally wears her hair over one shoulder. I love her face too, it's not too angular but has a good shape, full lips, and she doesn't wear false lashes but hers are black enough to add some nice contrast. She's like a Korean Georgia Peach!
4. Wanted a Korean girl.
I didn't make a thing tonight but I really don't mind after all the money I had last night.
1. Korean guy, think he wanted a Korean girl.
2. Said no thank you
3. Acted uninterested, let me talk to him though.
Oh look there's Lilli with her puppy. I don't think I've ever seen her drink with anyone else. On nights when he isn't here I've seen her sit moodily by herself. There was a Lilli at my first bar too. They are aggressive, don't give a crap about their guys, and flirt shamelessly. Then when the night is over they take a cab home without looking back. I wish I could be more like them. You should see the way she hangs around his neck and whispers sweet nothings into his ear and laughs into his eyes. He's clearly smitten.
There's 5 other girls sitting down with me.
I want an anklet, they're so sexy. I talked to the lady wearing it. She's probably in her early 40's, very attractive. She was telling me how she has a couple part time jobs too too selling jewelry and real estate. She was divorced a while back and I told her how much I admired her for working so hard and being independent. She said very seriously that she didn't like being independent, that she'd rather be married. Honestly, I can't blame her. Sometimes being a housewife looks pretty damn awesome. If there were no kids involved let me add.
4. 3 local guys, only wanted S.
There's one girl here who's super popular, I hardly ever see her sitting down. She looks like a sexy sulky teenager. Probably why the guys love her. She doesn't walk very gracefully, and she's very petite.
There's another girl here, I'm pretty sure she's Korean. She has this perfectly lush figure and owns this dress that shows it off perfectly. It goes down to about her knees or a little lower, is clingy with a soft and stretchy material, and plunges at the neck. Her body looks soft and youthful, and she normally wears her hair over one shoulder. I love her face too, it's not too angular but has a good shape, full lips, and she doesn't wear false lashes but hers are black enough to add some nice contrast. She's like a Korean Georgia Peach!
4. Wanted a Korean girl.
I didn't make a thing tonight but I really don't mind after all the money I had last night.
Wednesday, September 23, 2015
9/16/15
A friend took me out to dinner tonight and we discussed my future and how I could be successful at the bar. The best way for a girl to make a lot of money is to have regulars - someone who comes at least once a week to see her specifically. In order to get regulars girls will try to establish (or make the customer think they are establishing) a real relationship. They exchange phone numbers, text regularly, and meet outside of the bar from time to time.
Although I've given my number to plenty of customers to call in case they come back, I've been very hesitant to meet outside the bar. I have been open to texting regularly and eventually perhaps meeting outside for lunch or dinner, but most of my customers have stopped responding after a few messages. I'm not sure what to think about that. So I guess it's a combination of reluctance on my part and disinterest on theirs. Also, I don't want to give a guy the idea that we are dating when all I'm doing is customer relations.
1. Approached a guy at the bar who kept looking back in my direction. It turned out he was just looking at the game on the TV above my head.
2. This guy was so scared by me; he blinked rapidly, smiled nervously with terror in his eyes and raised his hand as if warding off evil.
3.SWEET! I met this guy at my first bar. He used to be a fairly well-known Chinese actor from what the Chinese girls told me. He was definitely attracted to me so as soon as I recognized him I went over and said hello. I ended up sitting with him and he bought me at least 9 or 10 drinks.
4. Eventually #3 seemed to be drying up so I went to try my luck with a whole table of haole guys. The one I sat with got my number in case they came back the next night but didn't buy me a drink. K went over and I think was a little more aggressive because he bought her a drink. I can imagine it'd be hard to turn down K. .
5. I saw a guy standing up at the haole table so I went over to him and started off by asking if he would like a chair. He said no because he has a sore back. Peeerrrrrfect. I give a mean massage and immediately offered him my services. He accepted and I massaged his back and shoulders for about 20 minutes while he told me about himself. He's retired military and now works in Washington. The rest of the table I think were IT and military related. When I was done he gave me $40!!
Here's where the evening gets weird.
the haoles left and I went back to say hello to the actor fellow. He said they were going to another bar and would I like to come with? Hell yes! Dollar signs always appear when a guy says that, because you know they feel obligated to take care of you and you're probably going to make at least another $100. Then I saw the massage guy come back in with his friend and figured they were probably looking for me so I got up to go see what was up. That was probably a mistake. I should have just let them leave again.
It turns out his head had been a little bit turned by me. Which is flattering and all, but the guy was in his late fifties, sweet enough guy, but damn that's always awkward. The waiter came by to get us drinks and at first I was like "no I don't want one" and the waiter was like "wtf??" but then I took one after all cus hey girl gotta make her money. Only she doesn't know that apparently because you'll see what dumbass thing I did next. So I'm feeling sorry for this guy and his friend is like "is there anywhere we can go that the drinks aren't $20?" So he wants to hang out with me outside the bar. At first I'm all like nope nope nope because I'm going out with my other customer who's actually going to pay me. But I'm a complete softie, and I need to remember that women can't afford to be softies, especially in this kind of business. I look at this guy, and he's so eager, like a 14 year old kid, and in my head I go "oh what the hell, I already made enough money tonight." You know I was a little drunk, that's going to be my excuse. So I said "ok, how about some breakfast?"
DO YOU KNOW WHAT THIS DUMBASS DOES??! AND WHAT I LET HIM DO? I want to kick both of us. Ugh I'm so disgusted by my naivete. This dumbass takes me back to his HOTEL, apparently to order room service, which, oops, stopped at 1. Ladies, do not trust a man unless you have lived with him for 20 years. And, most of all, do not leave money on the table just so you don't hurt the feelings of some guy you just met. So whatever, my whole sweet "I'm so in love with you act" dies pretty quickly once I stop getting paid. Cus mother fucker this is my time now. But I'm holding on to it as best I can just so he doesn't get an awful shock. Arg but he just starts doing the most horribly trite, obvious things. He wants the rest of his massage. Sigh, ok, just because he said in the taxi he would pay me better for the next one and I might as well try to make something. Don't shake your head at me, I can shake my own head at myself and I'm doing it so hard right now it's about to fall off thank you very much.
So anyways, I'm giving him a massage and then he gets up and asks if I would like one. Let me swallow back the vomit as I say I actually did it, and he sucked at giving massages btw. Men are stupid, and we let them be stupid! I am the worst offender. So then of course he's like "this would be so much easier without your dress." Hah! yeah I bet that would make it easier for you. You'll be glad to know that I did not acquiesce to that request. So then I think he started kissing my neck or something, I don't know but I turned over and he tried to kiss me for real. I was like "uuum no." I mumbled something about my scooter and scooted for the bed. Can you believe I still felt sorry for this guy? Because at the door I was all like "you're a nice guy I'm glad we met blah blah blah." I think he didn't like feeling like a loser who lured young girls back to his room with the promise of breakfast because he instantly apologized and begged me to stay. You're right, I really should have left. It's never a good idea to give a guy a second chance, especially when he knows he's not going to get it without force...looking back I'm amazed the evening worked out as well as it did.
He asked me to finish the massage, which I did, and then asked to sit on the balcony for a few minutes while he smoked. Did you know the balcony was the scariest part of the whole evening? I don't know if it was the alcohol or just me being crazy but I was convinced that he might try to throw me off the damn balcony. I actually had adrenaline shooting through me and kept a casual hold of one of the bars, which I noticed was quite flimsy, the whole time. At one point he stood behind me and put his hands on my shoulders. I imagined myself falling through the air, just like the first few seconds of skydiving, except there wouldn't be a parachute.
A few minutes later we went back inside, he gave me $240, and I skeedadled, hopefully a much wiser woman, but I have my doubts.
The thing I really remember about this evening is imagining this guy as a younger man. He had scars all over him from his time in Iraq, and I remember being enamored by an ex-marine with similar ones. I ran my hands over them and thought about how they only made him more attractive. I wondered if anyone ever did that for my aged colonel. He had a strong, hairy body, even if the skin was much more saggy and wrinkled now, and I imagined him in bdu's, carrying a gun, alert and in-control, and had any girls ever thought he was the epitome of manhood? And now he was losing his head and spending too much on a young working girl.
Although I've given my number to plenty of customers to call in case they come back, I've been very hesitant to meet outside the bar. I have been open to texting regularly and eventually perhaps meeting outside for lunch or dinner, but most of my customers have stopped responding after a few messages. I'm not sure what to think about that. So I guess it's a combination of reluctance on my part and disinterest on theirs. Also, I don't want to give a guy the idea that we are dating when all I'm doing is customer relations.
1. Approached a guy at the bar who kept looking back in my direction. It turned out he was just looking at the game on the TV above my head.
2. This guy was so scared by me; he blinked rapidly, smiled nervously with terror in his eyes and raised his hand as if warding off evil.
3.SWEET! I met this guy at my first bar. He used to be a fairly well-known Chinese actor from what the Chinese girls told me. He was definitely attracted to me so as soon as I recognized him I went over and said hello. I ended up sitting with him and he bought me at least 9 or 10 drinks.
4. Eventually #3 seemed to be drying up so I went to try my luck with a whole table of haole guys. The one I sat with got my number in case they came back the next night but didn't buy me a drink. K went over and I think was a little more aggressive because he bought her a drink. I can imagine it'd be hard to turn down K. .
5. I saw a guy standing up at the haole table so I went over to him and started off by asking if he would like a chair. He said no because he has a sore back. Peeerrrrrfect. I give a mean massage and immediately offered him my services. He accepted and I massaged his back and shoulders for about 20 minutes while he told me about himself. He's retired military and now works in Washington. The rest of the table I think were IT and military related. When I was done he gave me $40!!
Here's where the evening gets weird.
the haoles left and I went back to say hello to the actor fellow. He said they were going to another bar and would I like to come with? Hell yes! Dollar signs always appear when a guy says that, because you know they feel obligated to take care of you and you're probably going to make at least another $100. Then I saw the massage guy come back in with his friend and figured they were probably looking for me so I got up to go see what was up. That was probably a mistake. I should have just let them leave again.
It turns out his head had been a little bit turned by me. Which is flattering and all, but the guy was in his late fifties, sweet enough guy, but damn that's always awkward. The waiter came by to get us drinks and at first I was like "no I don't want one" and the waiter was like "wtf??" but then I took one after all cus hey girl gotta make her money. Only she doesn't know that apparently because you'll see what dumbass thing I did next. So I'm feeling sorry for this guy and his friend is like "is there anywhere we can go that the drinks aren't $20?" So he wants to hang out with me outside the bar. At first I'm all like nope nope nope because I'm going out with my other customer who's actually going to pay me. But I'm a complete softie, and I need to remember that women can't afford to be softies, especially in this kind of business. I look at this guy, and he's so eager, like a 14 year old kid, and in my head I go "oh what the hell, I already made enough money tonight." You know I was a little drunk, that's going to be my excuse. So I said "ok, how about some breakfast?"
DO YOU KNOW WHAT THIS DUMBASS DOES??! AND WHAT I LET HIM DO? I want to kick both of us. Ugh I'm so disgusted by my naivete. This dumbass takes me back to his HOTEL, apparently to order room service, which, oops, stopped at 1. Ladies, do not trust a man unless you have lived with him for 20 years. And, most of all, do not leave money on the table just so you don't hurt the feelings of some guy you just met. So whatever, my whole sweet "I'm so in love with you act" dies pretty quickly once I stop getting paid. Cus mother fucker this is my time now. But I'm holding on to it as best I can just so he doesn't get an awful shock. Arg but he just starts doing the most horribly trite, obvious things. He wants the rest of his massage. Sigh, ok, just because he said in the taxi he would pay me better for the next one and I might as well try to make something. Don't shake your head at me, I can shake my own head at myself and I'm doing it so hard right now it's about to fall off thank you very much.
So anyways, I'm giving him a massage and then he gets up and asks if I would like one. Let me swallow back the vomit as I say I actually did it, and he sucked at giving massages btw. Men are stupid, and we let them be stupid! I am the worst offender. So then of course he's like "this would be so much easier without your dress." Hah! yeah I bet that would make it easier for you. You'll be glad to know that I did not acquiesce to that request. So then I think he started kissing my neck or something, I don't know but I turned over and he tried to kiss me for real. I was like "uuum no." I mumbled something about my scooter and scooted for the bed. Can you believe I still felt sorry for this guy? Because at the door I was all like "you're a nice guy I'm glad we met blah blah blah." I think he didn't like feeling like a loser who lured young girls back to his room with the promise of breakfast because he instantly apologized and begged me to stay. You're right, I really should have left. It's never a good idea to give a guy a second chance, especially when he knows he's not going to get it without force...looking back I'm amazed the evening worked out as well as it did.
He asked me to finish the massage, which I did, and then asked to sit on the balcony for a few minutes while he smoked. Did you know the balcony was the scariest part of the whole evening? I don't know if it was the alcohol or just me being crazy but I was convinced that he might try to throw me off the damn balcony. I actually had adrenaline shooting through me and kept a casual hold of one of the bars, which I noticed was quite flimsy, the whole time. At one point he stood behind me and put his hands on my shoulders. I imagined myself falling through the air, just like the first few seconds of skydiving, except there wouldn't be a parachute.
A few minutes later we went back inside, he gave me $240, and I skeedadled, hopefully a much wiser woman, but I have my doubts.
The thing I really remember about this evening is imagining this guy as a younger man. He had scars all over him from his time in Iraq, and I remember being enamored by an ex-marine with similar ones. I ran my hands over them and thought about how they only made him more attractive. I wondered if anyone ever did that for my aged colonel. He had a strong, hairy body, even if the skin was much more saggy and wrinkled now, and I imagined him in bdu's, carrying a gun, alert and in-control, and had any girls ever thought he was the epitome of manhood? And now he was losing his head and spending too much on a young working girl.
Saturday, September 19, 2015
9/15/15
I have a second job and come directly from there to the bar wearing flats, a loose off-shoulder shirt, and skinny jeans. I met my friend K from Taiwan in the bathroom and she looked at me in astonishment and asked "are you wearing that to the bar??"
I had already been questioning my wardrobe choice for that evening because most of the girls dress to impress - dresses, heels, etc. Although I often see one of the Mama's wearing blue jeans with a black blazer. However, there was nothing I could do about it now, so I swung my hips and walked with my head high.
1. A group of young guys came in and sat at a table. No one approached them and K and I were trying to figure out why. We asked the girls and waiter "are they Korean? Do they want girls?" No one seemed to know so finally we just got up and walked over to them. Karen immediately sat down but I stood and flirted for a minute before asking the two guys on that side of the table if I could sit. One of them immediately got up for me!
It turned out they weren't so young - that happens so often with Asians I've found. My friend K, for instance, is 35 but could easily pass for 23 with her dewy, unlined face. The guy who ended up buying me 3 drinks was actually 37. They were fun and I flirted my ass off. The craziest thing was that none of the other girls had moved in on them. Maybe because they are more established, and also the waiter is more likely to call them over, so I think some of them have gotten a little lazy.
2. Next was a group of 3 guys, two local, one of them white. I ended up sitting next to the white guy. He bought me one drink and then invited me to come hang out with them elsewhere. This isn't an uncommon request - I've had many guys invite me to leave work come eat udon, go to a dance club, or, of course, go back to their home with them. So I said I couldn't, I had to work and make money. My guy asked how much I would normally make for the rest of the night and I said $100. He agreed! This isn't super uncommon either; my haole friend once had a man she met outside the bar give her $100 to spend the evening drinking with him at a pub after she told him she couldn't because she needed to work.
We ended up going to the bar next door, where I was a little uncomfortable because I thought we were going to a none-hostess bar. He didn't buy me any drinks, and the waiter didn't know I was a working girl so I didn't receive commission for it. That was ok, because it turns out my customer just wanted to give it to me in cash. This is actually really frowned upon: if you bring a customer to a hostess bar it's only fair to give them a percentage of your earnings. They will actually throw you out if they see it happening. However, I think it was OK this one time because of all the confusion surrounding me, and I'm sure I'll bring a proper customer there before too long.
Turns out guys don't seem to mind if I'm wearing a little black dress or jeans! A business man who is friends with me and my haole friend said we should probably try to capitalize on our "wholesome, girl-next-door" vibe anyways. It seems to be working for me since a lot of guys have commented on how nice I am, nothing like the stereotypical "rude" Korean hostess. Although to be fair, I feel like most of the hostesses are pretty decent, if not quite so forthcoming as I am. I will say that could just be a learned behavior - I already know I'm much more demanding than I was 3 months ago.
All in all a good night! Lord knows I needed one after the last few. I feel bad for my readers because almost all of my posts so far have been so depressing.
I had already been questioning my wardrobe choice for that evening because most of the girls dress to impress - dresses, heels, etc. Although I often see one of the Mama's wearing blue jeans with a black blazer. However, there was nothing I could do about it now, so I swung my hips and walked with my head high.
1. A group of young guys came in and sat at a table. No one approached them and K and I were trying to figure out why. We asked the girls and waiter "are they Korean? Do they want girls?" No one seemed to know so finally we just got up and walked over to them. Karen immediately sat down but I stood and flirted for a minute before asking the two guys on that side of the table if I could sit. One of them immediately got up for me!
It turned out they weren't so young - that happens so often with Asians I've found. My friend K, for instance, is 35 but could easily pass for 23 with her dewy, unlined face. The guy who ended up buying me 3 drinks was actually 37. They were fun and I flirted my ass off. The craziest thing was that none of the other girls had moved in on them. Maybe because they are more established, and also the waiter is more likely to call them over, so I think some of them have gotten a little lazy.
2. Next was a group of 3 guys, two local, one of them white. I ended up sitting next to the white guy. He bought me one drink and then invited me to come hang out with them elsewhere. This isn't an uncommon request - I've had many guys invite me to leave work come eat udon, go to a dance club, or, of course, go back to their home with them. So I said I couldn't, I had to work and make money. My guy asked how much I would normally make for the rest of the night and I said $100. He agreed! This isn't super uncommon either; my haole friend once had a man she met outside the bar give her $100 to spend the evening drinking with him at a pub after she told him she couldn't because she needed to work.
We ended up going to the bar next door, where I was a little uncomfortable because I thought we were going to a none-hostess bar. He didn't buy me any drinks, and the waiter didn't know I was a working girl so I didn't receive commission for it. That was ok, because it turns out my customer just wanted to give it to me in cash. This is actually really frowned upon: if you bring a customer to a hostess bar it's only fair to give them a percentage of your earnings. They will actually throw you out if they see it happening. However, I think it was OK this one time because of all the confusion surrounding me, and I'm sure I'll bring a proper customer there before too long.
Turns out guys don't seem to mind if I'm wearing a little black dress or jeans! A business man who is friends with me and my haole friend said we should probably try to capitalize on our "wholesome, girl-next-door" vibe anyways. It seems to be working for me since a lot of guys have commented on how nice I am, nothing like the stereotypical "rude" Korean hostess. Although to be fair, I feel like most of the hostesses are pretty decent, if not quite so forthcoming as I am. I will say that could just be a learned behavior - I already know I'm much more demanding than I was 3 months ago.
All in all a good night! Lord knows I needed one after the last few. I feel bad for my readers because almost all of my posts so far have been so depressing.
Friday, September 18, 2015
9/14/15
My scooter broke tonight. It was another super rough night. I was on my way in to work, IN THE POURING RAIN, when my scooter started coughing and finally stopped. I had just put $300 into it after it broke down last week so this was completely unexpected. My friend S was a complete dear and picked me up. I don't even know why I called him, it was just a knee-jerk reaction. After all, when you break down you're supposed to call someone for some reason right? Anyways, I chained up my moped on the sidewalk and didn't even care if it was gone the next day.
We were just headed home when the guy who took me into the karoke room texted and asked if I'd be at work that night. I went on in to work where I met him, a friend, and another business associate from Japan. I sat next to the associate and another girl was called for his friend. I did my darndest, I really did, but I just couldn't get much enthusiasm from my guy. He was nice enough, but seemed shy. He was probably also pretty tired after flying in from Japan that day. After two drinks they left and that was it for me for the night.
Without my bike and with so few drinks I had to catch the bus and leave work early.
We were just headed home when the guy who took me into the karoke room texted and asked if I'd be at work that night. I went on in to work where I met him, a friend, and another business associate from Japan. I sat next to the associate and another girl was called for his friend. I did my darndest, I really did, but I just couldn't get much enthusiasm from my guy. He was nice enough, but seemed shy. He was probably also pretty tired after flying in from Japan that day. After two drinks they left and that was it for me for the night.
Without my bike and with so few drinks I had to catch the bus and leave work early.
Tuesday, September 15, 2015
9/12/15
I really think my days here are numbered.
1. I talked to a woman I thought was the Mama about my trouble getting customers and she immediately got up and begged these two men to sit with me. It turns out she isn't actually the Mama, but it was still a very nice thing for her to do. They were two blue-collar guys who obviously just wanted to be left alone but they softened toward me when they saw how nervous I was. Nice guys.
2. My friend B came in and bought me two drinks. He encouraged me to approach more customers, like sales people do who just keep asking until they make it. I need a goal however, so from now on I'll go for 12 instead of 6.
3. A couple of local guys who already knew someone.
4. A white guy who wasn't sure where he and his friends were sitting or if they were even going to stay. I went to talk to someone else and he sat down but another lady got to him before I could.
5. A white guy sitting with Asian men who all weren't interested in girls.
6. Didn't make eye contact.
There was quite a tussle. I was getting some water and I heard someone screaming in Korean. I looked over to see an older lady customer completely bitch slap S - our popular bartender/hostess. A couple guys held back S as the older lady beat a hasty retreat. Good thing she did because S was ready to tear her to pieces. After that slap I didn't blame her. She was in a rage and yelled at the bar back to call the police but he didn't. Police are bad for business.
7. Not sure if this counts; I hesitated as I walked past and said hello. Nada
8. White guy at the bar who just came to say hi to the bartender.
I'll just sit here and pick out karoke songs. I have a list on my phone because otherwise I forget my favorite ones. I wish I got to sing more!
9. Young gay in Navy "C" buying drinks for everyone. Success! He bought me 2 fireballs. I thought I would despise anything straight up but I really like fireballs! They taste like cinnamon and leave a nice warmth and aftertaste. Now I'm drunk.
10. Bunch of young guys, including a white guy. He said He'd be back. We'll see what happens.
Nope I guess not. However the guy the guy he was sitting with was very nice. We did this whole communication thing with our eyes. He smiled rather apologetically like "I'm so sorry, not tonight" and I smiled back and shrugged a little like "it's ok, I know how it is."
Ok so I made $100 tonight. $10 for Kitchen Mama since I ate dinner, $10 for the bar, and $5 for the waiters. That leaves $75 for me. The other girls would think that's a bad night but it's not bad for me.
You gotta respect S. She jumped right back in after that fiasco and started making money.
The one waiter, he doesn't really speak English, but he smiled and laughed in a friendly way when I gave him his tip.
11. Nice guys, but didn't want company.
12. I was lazy on this one too. I barely slowed down as I walked past and said hello and how are you.
It would be nice to have one or two more.
I made $415 for this week and worked 30 hours. That's $13.83 per hour. It's not bad, but I definitely want better.
1. I talked to a woman I thought was the Mama about my trouble getting customers and she immediately got up and begged these two men to sit with me. It turns out she isn't actually the Mama, but it was still a very nice thing for her to do. They were two blue-collar guys who obviously just wanted to be left alone but they softened toward me when they saw how nervous I was. Nice guys.
2. My friend B came in and bought me two drinks. He encouraged me to approach more customers, like sales people do who just keep asking until they make it. I need a goal however, so from now on I'll go for 12 instead of 6.
3. A couple of local guys who already knew someone.
4. A white guy who wasn't sure where he and his friends were sitting or if they were even going to stay. I went to talk to someone else and he sat down but another lady got to him before I could.
5. A white guy sitting with Asian men who all weren't interested in girls.
6. Didn't make eye contact.
There was quite a tussle. I was getting some water and I heard someone screaming in Korean. I looked over to see an older lady customer completely bitch slap S - our popular bartender/hostess. A couple guys held back S as the older lady beat a hasty retreat. Good thing she did because S was ready to tear her to pieces. After that slap I didn't blame her. She was in a rage and yelled at the bar back to call the police but he didn't. Police are bad for business.
7. Not sure if this counts; I hesitated as I walked past and said hello. Nada
8. White guy at the bar who just came to say hi to the bartender.
I'll just sit here and pick out karoke songs. I have a list on my phone because otherwise I forget my favorite ones. I wish I got to sing more!
9. Young gay in Navy "C" buying drinks for everyone. Success! He bought me 2 fireballs. I thought I would despise anything straight up but I really like fireballs! They taste like cinnamon and leave a nice warmth and aftertaste. Now I'm drunk.
10. Bunch of young guys, including a white guy. He said He'd be back. We'll see what happens.
Nope I guess not. However the guy the guy he was sitting with was very nice. We did this whole communication thing with our eyes. He smiled rather apologetically like "I'm so sorry, not tonight" and I smiled back and shrugged a little like "it's ok, I know how it is."
Ok so I made $100 tonight. $10 for Kitchen Mama since I ate dinner, $10 for the bar, and $5 for the waiters. That leaves $75 for me. The other girls would think that's a bad night but it's not bad for me.
You gotta respect S. She jumped right back in after that fiasco and started making money.
The one waiter, he doesn't really speak English, but he smiled and laughed in a friendly way when I gave him his tip.
11. Nice guys, but didn't want company.
12. I was lazy on this one too. I barely slowed down as I walked past and said hello and how are you.
It would be nice to have one or two more.
I made $415 for this week and worked 30 hours. That's $13.83 per hour. It's not bad, but I definitely want better.
Monday, September 14, 2015
9/11/15
"It's been raining all day and the bar is dead. The girls sit around and chat lazily. It must be nice getting paid AND making a shit ton of money. Why am I doing this again?"
I should note here that I am not drawing any pay from this bar. It sounds sketchy but it's fairly common, especially for a struggling girl like me. I would say about 10-15 of the girls receive minimum and are expected to be there six days a week from 7:30-1:30. Although I don't have the security of a paycheck, I can come and go as I please. Another downside is that the bar has nothing invested in me so there's no effort by the Mama or, more commonly, the waiters to introduce me to customers. A couple of the girls have been very kind however and sometimes recommend a table for me to try. This comes especially from my friend K, who is from Taiwan, and a lady from Vietnam.
1. J came in and bought me 2 drinks. We watched the volleyball game and he hugged me when Hawaii won.
2. 2 guys who barely made eye contact and turned away.
I was talking to the Vietnamese woman (I really should learn her name) who said she's been doing this for 10 years. Gawd these people suck at being comforting. I shared my struggles from last night and asked if she'd had any trouble when she first started and she said not really. Thanks.
That's the thing about kindness here; I've experienced it, but I can't expect it. Everyone is focused on the money and a person can sink or swim. So people can be completely cold and uninterested in my well being, but there are exceptions. Like my first night there when I had one drink and was almost in tears. A Korean girl who is always studying English asked how I had done and I just held up 1 finger and looked back down miserably. She got up and left, but came back a minute later with a glass of tea and $15. She had bought me a second drink! I almost did burst into tears at that.
3. I didn't make a huge effort, just asked about the score. The guy was super awkward and I felt weird trying to continue talking to him.
Kitchen Mama always stares at me angrily it seems, even though I feel like I tip her fairly when I eat and try to be friendly. I asked for a fried egg tonight with my dinner. People have told me that that's a completely reasonable thing to do. She gestured indignantly at the other pots filled with food for the girls. I can see her point - she had made a lot of food, but I hate fish soup and the rest of it was super spicy or meat-based.
I wonder what S is doing now? She's the only Asian girl I've met here who doesn't seem to be doing terrifically. It seems weird to me because she's super hot and perky. She's mixed korean/Japanese with long black hair, a lithe body covered in attractive tattoos on her shoulders, and a beautifully symmetrical and made-up face. She always looks amazing and I tell her so. She said men don't like girls with tattoos. I wonder if that's true? I asked the other S who's experienced working behind the bar and she said that tattoo S isn't aggressive enough. It's true she's told me in the past that she waits for the waiter to come and get her. Still, men in general there seem to want one specific thing. I would think there'd be plenty willing to put aside their expectations for her though!
4 Local guy. Polite enough but just didn't seem interested.
5. Waiting for someone.
6. 3 guys, probably Korean. Looked chagrined when I sat down, muttered uncomfortably to each other and then told me sorry it was too early.
I'll wait until 11:30, then I'll go home. I've been sleeping so much. Last night I slept from 1-11, then from 2:30-6, and I can't wait to face my bed again. IIs it because of stress/depression? Probably just my body being itself.
These other girls are so calm. They aren't stressed. I wish life could be easier. I'm willing to do without a lot, but I can feel the constant financial anxiety eating away at me.
Maybe I shoudl go back to Indiana and let Dad help me find a job. I'm afraid though, I always feel so mentally fatigued. Just getting normal things like paying bills or cooking and cleaning seem excruciatingly hard.
Oh look there's K. She just waltzed in and got a customer again. I try to remember that she used to own a bar like this, except it was Taiwanese, so she's more comfortable here, but God it's hard. I'm her for 3 hours, I talk to at least 6 people and I have 2 measly drinks. She comes in at 10:30 and makes her money. Dammit I didn't even see that white guy. (K and I normally go for white guys because they're the most likely to buy us drinks, me because I'm white, her because she speaks English fairly well).
7. Some young guy who just raised his hand and looked back at the video he was watching on his ph
I should note here that I am not drawing any pay from this bar. It sounds sketchy but it's fairly common, especially for a struggling girl like me. I would say about 10-15 of the girls receive minimum and are expected to be there six days a week from 7:30-1:30. Although I don't have the security of a paycheck, I can come and go as I please. Another downside is that the bar has nothing invested in me so there's no effort by the Mama or, more commonly, the waiters to introduce me to customers. A couple of the girls have been very kind however and sometimes recommend a table for me to try. This comes especially from my friend K, who is from Taiwan, and a lady from Vietnam.
1. J came in and bought me 2 drinks. We watched the volleyball game and he hugged me when Hawaii won.
2. 2 guys who barely made eye contact and turned away.
I was talking to the Vietnamese woman (I really should learn her name) who said she's been doing this for 10 years. Gawd these people suck at being comforting. I shared my struggles from last night and asked if she'd had any trouble when she first started and she said not really. Thanks.
That's the thing about kindness here; I've experienced it, but I can't expect it. Everyone is focused on the money and a person can sink or swim. So people can be completely cold and uninterested in my well being, but there are exceptions. Like my first night there when I had one drink and was almost in tears. A Korean girl who is always studying English asked how I had done and I just held up 1 finger and looked back down miserably. She got up and left, but came back a minute later with a glass of tea and $15. She had bought me a second drink! I almost did burst into tears at that.
3. I didn't make a huge effort, just asked about the score. The guy was super awkward and I felt weird trying to continue talking to him.
Kitchen Mama always stares at me angrily it seems, even though I feel like I tip her fairly when I eat and try to be friendly. I asked for a fried egg tonight with my dinner. People have told me that that's a completely reasonable thing to do. She gestured indignantly at the other pots filled with food for the girls. I can see her point - she had made a lot of food, but I hate fish soup and the rest of it was super spicy or meat-based.
I wonder what S is doing now? She's the only Asian girl I've met here who doesn't seem to be doing terrifically. It seems weird to me because she's super hot and perky. She's mixed korean/Japanese with long black hair, a lithe body covered in attractive tattoos on her shoulders, and a beautifully symmetrical and made-up face. She always looks amazing and I tell her so. She said men don't like girls with tattoos. I wonder if that's true? I asked the other S who's experienced working behind the bar and she said that tattoo S isn't aggressive enough. It's true she's told me in the past that she waits for the waiter to come and get her. Still, men in general there seem to want one specific thing. I would think there'd be plenty willing to put aside their expectations for her though!
4 Local guy. Polite enough but just didn't seem interested.
5. Waiting for someone.
6. 3 guys, probably Korean. Looked chagrined when I sat down, muttered uncomfortably to each other and then told me sorry it was too early.
I'll wait until 11:30, then I'll go home. I've been sleeping so much. Last night I slept from 1-11, then from 2:30-6, and I can't wait to face my bed again. IIs it because of stress/depression? Probably just my body being itself.
These other girls are so calm. They aren't stressed. I wish life could be easier. I'm willing to do without a lot, but I can feel the constant financial anxiety eating away at me.
Maybe I shoudl go back to Indiana and let Dad help me find a job. I'm afraid though, I always feel so mentally fatigued. Just getting normal things like paying bills or cooking and cleaning seem excruciatingly hard.
Oh look there's K. She just waltzed in and got a customer again. I try to remember that she used to own a bar like this, except it was Taiwanese, so she's more comfortable here, but God it's hard. I'm her for 3 hours, I talk to at least 6 people and I have 2 measly drinks. She comes in at 10:30 and makes her money. Dammit I didn't even see that white guy. (K and I normally go for white guys because they're the most likely to buy us drinks, me because I'm white, her because she speaks English fairly well).
7. Some young guy who just raised his hand and looked back at the video he was watching on his ph
Sunday, September 13, 2015
9/9/15 - 9/10/15
Wednesday, 9/9/15
I really need to make money tonight. I took some out of my savings to visit my brother. I hate doing that but I miss my family so much. Then my scooter broke down and I haven't made any money at the bar since Friday - 4 days ago!"
Thursday, 9/10/15
So last night after I wrote that last bit I ran to say hello to 3 men who came in. 1 almost immediately bought me a drink and then they went into the karoke room and invited me to come with them!!! I NEVER get to go into the karoke room but some of the girls are back there all the time. They bought each of us 4 girls 3 bottles of soju. I didn't know what I was supposed to do with them at first - was I supposed to share them with the customer? But I watched the other girls and figured it out. They came with 3 glasses on a towel - one small, empty one, one filled with ice, and one filled with ice and tea. The bottles are warm so you are supposed to first pour it into the cup filled with ice to cool it, and then into the small glass. The bottle is just for the girl; the customer orders his own drinks. I was trying to do exactly what the other girls did but of course I got a little tipsy after just a little soju and Mama called me out to ask me why I wasn't drinking faster. Obviously the faster you drink the faster the customer can buy you another bottle.
They were 3 local businessmen with a colleague from Japan. The three local men were very respectful and I enjoyed talking to mine. He even let me order myself a Korean pancake when i asked because I wasn't used to drinking so much. However the Japanese man, who got two girls, was feeling very frisky. I felt sorry for the girls with him. He dropped a fake cigarette down one of their skirts and groped and spanked them whenever they stood up.
Oh I have a story about the pancake. The Kitchen Mama was very kind to me in the beginning but on that night I went into the kitchen to order something to help deal with the alcohol and asked her what I should get. She slammed an order pad and pen on the counter and said "if you don't know I don't know!" One of the managers/djs/bouncers was in there and I said "fine, pancake!" And he said "what you think this is pancake house?!" I was pretty tipsy by that time so I just bellowed "Korean! Korean pancake!" He nodded and wrote it down for me and a minute later it came out.
It never rains but it pours. After the businessmen left I ran into one of the first people I met there - a blue collar local guy with his three friends. I love those guys! He's so fun and always respectful and they adore my singing. He bought me 3 more drinks so I got 3 bottles - $255 and 4 drinks - $60 for the night.
You can imagine that in the morning I woke up feeling quite luxurious. However tonight I'm back to feeling shy and hesitant. I hate being rejected! I talked to one guy already. Only 5 to go!
2. Super awkward but I survived, like I always do. 3 to go.
Uh oh. Moving back into that where I question all my life choices. When it's good it's so good but the other 85% of the time it sucks. I already made my weekly quota last night so now I need to relax.
3. Not super awkward. One guy at least engaged in conversation before politely turning down my request to join them. I love journaling through this. It's very comforting for some reason.
4. Guy at bar already taken with bartender.
5. Guy smiled at me and I sat down for a moment. Had met him at Summit. Didn't seem inclined to buy though.
6. White guy just having a quick drink.
7. Came with customer (K) before. Also didn't seem inclined to buy.
8. Maybe should have tried harder with these guys, but I was getting all the wrong signals from theM.
False Thoughts:
I don't understand it! Karen just got here, she went up to one person and got a drink! They seemed to welcome her but I don't think she knew them.
Sometimes I can't help but feel that it's my lot in life to struggle. That what's easy for others will always be agonizingly difficult for me. I mean I've been here for over 3 hours. Maybe I should just go home. No I'll wait til 11:30. In the past sometimes I haven't gotten my first drink till 11.
Another 40 minutes.
It's so easy to shake me, to make me believe that there is really something intrinsically wrong with me. Guess this is what the absence of inner peace looks like.
I really need to make money tonight. I took some out of my savings to visit my brother. I hate doing that but I miss my family so much. Then my scooter broke down and I haven't made any money at the bar since Friday - 4 days ago!"
Thursday, 9/10/15
So last night after I wrote that last bit I ran to say hello to 3 men who came in. 1 almost immediately bought me a drink and then they went into the karoke room and invited me to come with them!!! I NEVER get to go into the karoke room but some of the girls are back there all the time. They bought each of us 4 girls 3 bottles of soju. I didn't know what I was supposed to do with them at first - was I supposed to share them with the customer? But I watched the other girls and figured it out. They came with 3 glasses on a towel - one small, empty one, one filled with ice, and one filled with ice and tea. The bottles are warm so you are supposed to first pour it into the cup filled with ice to cool it, and then into the small glass. The bottle is just for the girl; the customer orders his own drinks. I was trying to do exactly what the other girls did but of course I got a little tipsy after just a little soju and Mama called me out to ask me why I wasn't drinking faster. Obviously the faster you drink the faster the customer can buy you another bottle.
They were 3 local businessmen with a colleague from Japan. The three local men were very respectful and I enjoyed talking to mine. He even let me order myself a Korean pancake when i asked because I wasn't used to drinking so much. However the Japanese man, who got two girls, was feeling very frisky. I felt sorry for the girls with him. He dropped a fake cigarette down one of their skirts and groped and spanked them whenever they stood up.
Oh I have a story about the pancake. The Kitchen Mama was very kind to me in the beginning but on that night I went into the kitchen to order something to help deal with the alcohol and asked her what I should get. She slammed an order pad and pen on the counter and said "if you don't know I don't know!" One of the managers/djs/bouncers was in there and I said "fine, pancake!" And he said "what you think this is pancake house?!" I was pretty tipsy by that time so I just bellowed "Korean! Korean pancake!" He nodded and wrote it down for me and a minute later it came out.
It never rains but it pours. After the businessmen left I ran into one of the first people I met there - a blue collar local guy with his three friends. I love those guys! He's so fun and always respectful and they adore my singing. He bought me 3 more drinks so I got 3 bottles - $255 and 4 drinks - $60 for the night.
You can imagine that in the morning I woke up feeling quite luxurious. However tonight I'm back to feeling shy and hesitant. I hate being rejected! I talked to one guy already. Only 5 to go!
2. Super awkward but I survived, like I always do. 3 to go.
Uh oh. Moving back into that where I question all my life choices. When it's good it's so good but the other 85% of the time it sucks. I already made my weekly quota last night so now I need to relax.
3. Not super awkward. One guy at least engaged in conversation before politely turning down my request to join them. I love journaling through this. It's very comforting for some reason.
4. Guy at bar already taken with bartender.
5. Guy smiled at me and I sat down for a moment. Had met him at Summit. Didn't seem inclined to buy though.
6. White guy just having a quick drink.
7. Came with customer (K) before. Also didn't seem inclined to buy.
8. Maybe should have tried harder with these guys, but I was getting all the wrong signals from theM.
False Thoughts:
- Customers don't want to talk to me.
- I'm bothering them.
- I don't have the right to talk to them.
- Why wouldn't they want to talk to me?
- This is my workplace; I have every right to interact with them within it.
- I'm awesome and doing them a favor by talking to them (that's what my boss at the other job always tells me about showing customers a new product).
I don't understand it! Karen just got here, she went up to one person and got a drink! They seemed to welcome her but I don't think she knew them.
Sometimes I can't help but feel that it's my lot in life to struggle. That what's easy for others will always be agonizingly difficult for me. I mean I've been here for over 3 hours. Maybe I should just go home. No I'll wait til 11:30. In the past sometimes I haven't gotten my first drink till 11.
Another 40 minutes.
It's so easy to shake me, to make me believe that there is really something intrinsically wrong with me. Guess this is what the absence of inner peace looks like.
9/6/15
From now on I will be writing based off of notes taken throughout the evening. I constantly kick myself for dragging my feet on this and waiting over 3 months to buy a $.99 notebook.
I actually originally bought the notebook to practice handwriting exercises to hopefully improve my horrible penmanship, but I soon found myself scribbling about the evening's happenings instead. The first entry, from September 6th, 2015, says:
"I introduced myself to the 4th prospects. It felt like gearing myself up to cut off my own foot with no meds. Not that cutting off one's foot would be easy regardless. I almost went home rather than put myself through it. I feel a crushing sense of my own struggles and failures. I have no magnetic personality or ruthless aggression."
During the last sentence I was thinking of certain people I've met in my life who have a charismatic personality or at least the passion and stamina necessary to win acquiescence. Sales people especially seem to have one or both of these qualities. You can also see them often in preachers and politicians. What really strikes me about them is that they seem to have regard for the feelings of their audience/market on the subject. They forge ahead regardless of the response. I am always acutely aware of my buyer's attitude and am quick to back down if I sense disinterest.
Then I wrote:
"Am I contributing to the oppression of women? Dressing up in my finery and allowing men to summon or send me away witha finger? Hanging on them and begging for my money? Maybe I should go be a..." and then I tallied up my yearly income.
"Ok, so I'm not doing terrible. I can definitely survive. This is only my first post-grad year and I've learned sooo much. I need to give myself a break don't I?"
Later:
"I'm trying to gear myself up to approach someone else. i can't do it. I just hate rejection so much. Oh my gosh, come on Frances! Just 2 more (I made myself approach at least 6 people or tables per night) then you can go home. Nope I can't. I can't do it. Everyone but me is sitting with someone. Just relax, you've been through this before. You'll be fine. You have every right to talk to anyone you want. This is your house, welcome them (that's what my boss at my part time job, also sales unfortunately, tells us to do with customers). Say hello and how is your night and such with real warmth. Think of it more as building connections than asking for money.
5. Ok I did it. It was ugly and awkward but I did it and I made him laugh!
6. They were nice, one guy even asked how I was and they were only a little bit awkward.
I did it, I didn't even care if I got a drink. I just needed to approach six people. K showed up but I think I'll go after talking to her."
That was a really rough night.
I actually originally bought the notebook to practice handwriting exercises to hopefully improve my horrible penmanship, but I soon found myself scribbling about the evening's happenings instead. The first entry, from September 6th, 2015, says:
"I introduced myself to the 4th prospects. It felt like gearing myself up to cut off my own foot with no meds. Not that cutting off one's foot would be easy regardless. I almost went home rather than put myself through it. I feel a crushing sense of my own struggles and failures. I have no magnetic personality or ruthless aggression."
During the last sentence I was thinking of certain people I've met in my life who have a charismatic personality or at least the passion and stamina necessary to win acquiescence. Sales people especially seem to have one or both of these qualities. You can also see them often in preachers and politicians. What really strikes me about them is that they seem to have regard for the feelings of their audience/market on the subject. They forge ahead regardless of the response. I am always acutely aware of my buyer's attitude and am quick to back down if I sense disinterest.
Then I wrote:
"Am I contributing to the oppression of women? Dressing up in my finery and allowing men to summon or send me away witha finger? Hanging on them and begging for my money? Maybe I should go be a..." and then I tallied up my yearly income.
"Ok, so I'm not doing terrible. I can definitely survive. This is only my first post-grad year and I've learned sooo much. I need to give myself a break don't I?"
Later:
"I'm trying to gear myself up to approach someone else. i can't do it. I just hate rejection so much. Oh my gosh, come on Frances! Just 2 more (I made myself approach at least 6 people or tables per night) then you can go home. Nope I can't. I can't do it. Everyone but me is sitting with someone. Just relax, you've been through this before. You'll be fine. You have every right to talk to anyone you want. This is your house, welcome them (that's what my boss at my part time job, also sales unfortunately, tells us to do with customers). Say hello and how is your night and such with real warmth. Think of it more as building connections than asking for money.
5. Ok I did it. It was ugly and awkward but I did it and I made him laugh!
6. They were nice, one guy even asked how I was and they were only a little bit awkward.
I did it, I didn't even care if I got a drink. I just needed to approach six people. K showed up but I think I'll go after talking to her."
That was a really rough night.
"How Did You Get Here?"
That's what everyone wants to know after watching my obviously Caucasian face and 5'8 body (6'2 with heels) cruise through a hostess bar filled with Koreans and other Asians. A Korean hostess club in Honolulu, for anyone unfamiliar with them, is much like a sports bar except there are women there, mostly Korean obviously, who are available to sit and entertain customers in exchange for $20 drinks, out of which which they receive a sizable commission. The really successful hostesses regularly convince their customers to buy them $100+ bottles of champagne or to make use of the Karoke Room, which is at least $100 to rent while buying bottles or $300+ when ordering regular drinks.
Anyways, this is what I tell the curious: I graduated from college and wanted to move somewhere exotic where I wouldn't need a Visa = Hawaii. Then my hours at the coffee shop where I was working were cut and another Haole (the local word for white) friend invited me to visit her at the bar where she worked.
That's the short version. The long version is that I went and was immediately captivated by the mysterious and, to me at the time, glamorous atmosphere. I didn't understand most of what was going on, but I understood the $30 they gave me just for talking to a couple of older Asian gentlemen. My Mom is a great listener, and people are always ready to take advantage of her. I feel like I share in her curse sometimes, but now I was actually getting paid to listen to people!! $30 is a paltry sum, but so is pay at a coffee shop, the bar promised me minimum, and told me I would be building up my clientele. Work at the coffee shop was going downhill and I needed something else ASAP, and like I said, I was captivated by this strange new environment that paid in cash and required me to look my sexy best. Hadn't I left Indiana just for these kinds of opportunities? Actually no; I left Indiana to live simply, go to the beach, and be the cute barista flirting with all the military guys. I've lamented that lost vision many times.
Still, my life is far from boring, and I'm excited to share life inside a hostess bar from a unique perspective (i.e. an American White Girl). I recently bought a small notebook which I keep with me in the bar and write down the events of the evening as they happen. I'll probably also recount past events as I think of them.
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